Go where You GLOW!

If there’s one thing I learned the most this past year, it is that your environment is very important.

Your circle of people, your partner, and also your space and location (as this is where you decide to spend a lot of your time, if not most of your time) have an enormous influence on your daily being and behavior.

I’ve traveled so much in my life, lived in so many different places and lived with so many different roommates, that I for sure have found a home within myself. I had to, otherwise I would feel lost each and every time I opened my eyes, once again, in another bed, room, city or country. For years, I have given myself the name ‘gypsy,’ as I truly lived out of a suitcase or would stay no longer than 6 months in only one place.

I’m very good at finding the positive in each new situation, which is why I wasn’t always as aware of the influence of my surroundings, as I almost felt like every new house, roommate or place had something new to teach me, which made me evolve into a better human or woman in general.

Only when I went home to Amsterdam this past winter, I suddenly was super aware how I felt my inner fire slowly die down. It felt as if my inner candle wasn’t lighting up the way I normally feel this burn inside, and soon enough, I had to sit myself down and ask what was going on…

It felt horrible that I woke up each morning in the cold and the darkness... I couldn’t deal with the fact that 70% of the time the sky was grey. I couldn’t believe how this environment was suddenly influencing my mood and my entire being on the daily, not in a positive way…

You would think, as I grew up in Amsterdam and lived there until the age of 20, that I would have gotten used to this. But, after having spent the last 10+ years mostly in the sun, I only now suddenly realized the influence of this grey weather. On top of it, I had lived the last 10+ years mostly day by day, and I realized soon enough that Amsterdam’s lifestyle was hard to hold onto at home, as everyone already had their calendar booked out for at least the next 4 weeks, if not more ... (Which was not my cup of tea anymore.)

Also, most people worked 5 days a week and preferred to hang out in the weekends, which was also new to me, as I haven’t divided my week in 5 weekdays with a weekend for years…. I truly was in culture shock! The only way through was trying my best to adjust to this routine and accepting this cold, the greyness and this calculated planned calendar (even though my body was saying that all of this was going against my natural needs).

Without truly paying too much attention to it, I felt myself slip away (while adjusting to the Dutch lifestyle again) and I slowly felt myself emotionally getting burned out... Even my sister, who called one day, said, “Wow, your ‘solo glow’ has totally left you, hasn’t it?”!!

And I couldn’t agree more. Right within that moment, I made a promise to myself... This is my last winter!

I do not want this weather or this lifestyle. I have a choice, and now that I know better, I want to do better and I do not want to choose this (knowing now that other places in the world would offer me a different life and lifestyle).

Why, if I feel so alive when I wake up in a place where the sky is blue and the sun reloads my everyday energy with so much glow…. Why when I could choose to look in the mirror, knowing I could see my tan and my blonde curls and glow while feeling energized and excited, would I choose to live in a place where I don’t feel like my best self every day? Why would I choose for anything less than my own best potential?

As soon as I moved back to LA, I felt myself recharge again... No lies (even though I’m not the biggest fan of LA and the weather wasn't the best these past month's either)… The difference was truly so obvious! Making appointments max 24 hours upfront (aka living in the moment), together with better and sunnier weather was clearly all the change I needed. My glow came back and I felt like myself again. I felt free to recharge and free to do and be me.

In May, I decided to go to my other home, Curaçao, as I became an aunty again and hadn’t seen my family from there in over a year. My friends and family refilled my heart with love, together with the ocean water and the Caribbean sun. As soon as I came back to LA, my LA friends told me I looked even more recharged since being back in LA, which confirmed to me the influence of each and every place and their people.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my home city Amsterdam (mainly in the Summer), and I still have many family members and friends out there who I love so much and would love to spend my life with every day! But, truly feeling the difference at my core by simply changing my environment and surroundings was something I could no longer deny…

I want to be somewhere where I glow the most and where my environment supports this part of my being, being myself, in the best way.

 I personally know I’m a sunshine lover and this is why a sunny state, together with a place where my biggest passion (dance) supports my glow a lot, is working for me at the moment. This doesn’t mean that everyone should move to the sun or to a city which supports the sunshine or their passion only. I know a lot of people who truly love the rain or prefer to be on land in the middle of nowhere with no people or entertainment around. There is no right or wrong! All I hope to do with this post is inspire you to think about your personal values and needs in life. What is a big priority for you? What makes your heart happy?

• Living close to family

• Living in a city full of entertainment

• Living in a place full of career opportunities

• Living in a place with great health insurance

• Living far away from the concrete jungle and close to nature

• Living in the sun

• Living in a place where it won’t get too hot

• Living in a place where nobody has an agenda

• Living in a place where people value planning

• Living in a place where people are very active

• Living close to the sea

• Living in the mountains 

• Living close to your best friends

• Living in a place with a secure lifestyle

• Living in a place where everything closes at midnight

• Living in a place where nothing closes at midnight

• Living in a place where politics align with your values

The list goes on…

Whatever comes to mind, trust this thought. I know we all can’t pack up our bags, right now, and move across the world. I also know moving away from your current place brings many sacrifices with it too. (I’m well aware that I will never be in a place anymore where I won’t miss certain people or things, EVER again. The sacrifices are REAL and happening, and those are sacrifices I have to deal with and live with for the rest of my life.)

But I also want to remind you that you only have one life to live, one life to make the most of and one life to live as the most glowing version of yourself. Change isn’t easy, but change is needed to become the healthiest, happiest and most glowing version of yourself. Change is truly needed to become the best version of yourself. And you only know about your needs of change the moment you allow yourself to live outside of your comfort zone and allow yourself to think outside of the box…

If there’s only one thing I now know and have learned, then it would be that I now want to go where I glow the most, and where my soul feels the most at home and where it recharges in the best way! 

I want to go where I GLOW.